033. - Video.

[brokenweapon]

[Who is this young-Matt-Damon-looking motherfucker? Hint: It's Jason. Not yet though, now he is Captain David Webb, U.S. Army. Military Intelligence. So he's just been plucked from Ft. Meade with these totally ill shades. And BDUs. Also he is from about 1997, so he's 27ish. And if you listen hard, you miiiiight be able to catch a Midwestern accent in there. So. Have fun.]

Hey, I'm not in the Navy, and I never asked to join any damned Barge. I'm looking back on all this shit that's supposedly from me - from me in the future - like that makes a fucking lick of sense.

Huh. Looks like I'm a taciturn son of a bitch in my thirties. [Also what the fuck why is everyone calling him Jason in these past entries. Meh. He's MI, he is not unused to the prospect of being undercover.]

Comments

no prob, hope you're feeling better!

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

[That earns a grin from Young David.] Are you a spy too? You look like some of the guys he works with.

Thanks! :D

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

[Captain Webb laughs.] Me? No. I'm not cut out to be a straight spook.

[OH THE IRONY.]

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

Bet you could if you wanted to. [David grins encouragingly.] So what do you do?

[THE IRONY IS STAGGERING.]

THIS CONVERSATION IS ADORABLE, CAN IT PLEASE NEVER END

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

[Webb grins back. Hey, he likes this kid. Future-him is shaking his head so hard.]

I'm in the Army. Career officer.

Sorry, Bourne, you get your scheduled asshole back shortly. xD

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

Dad says that's what I should do when I get older. What's it like?

[Future-him wants him to just SHUT UP WHILE HE'S AHEAD.]

DAMN YOUSE! xD So when's that going down?

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

It's difficult. And it's not for everybody. Basic's not great, but AIT is when it all starts to come together...and if you can find your niche, it's awesome.

[The only instance in recorded history where Jason Bourne has said "awesome".]

When did you want it to go down? I've just been waiting on you!

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

I haven't decided yet if I'm going to join too. It's kinda early to think about that, you know? [laughs]

[A milestone to mark on the calendars, if David had a calendar. :P]

DERP. Tomorrow? I'll be doing nothing.

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I wouldn't recommend thinking about that this early. [laughs] What do you want to do when you get older? As opposed to what your dad says.

Sounds good! I'll be on AIM in the morning then.

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

[He chews on that for a moment.] ... Dunno. I always figured I'd end up doing what mom or dad want. Dad wants me to go military and mom wants me to be a businessman.

I might not be awake until late morning. xD

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

I was lucky. My parents just wanted me to do something I'm good at. [He ducks his head.] Can't say dad's unhappy with me. Mom didn't want me to go to Iraq, but I went in at the tail end...but they respected my decision.

No problem! I'll be on most of the day.

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

Is it true they've got spiders over there so big you can cut one open and sleep in it?

Hahaha this.

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

...what? No.

[So bemused.]

I couldn't help myself.

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

Are you sure? My dad's friend told me about them. He said they were called camel spiders, because they eat camels.

Jesus Christ on a cracker I just googled those. AUGH AUGH AUGH

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

Oh, the camel spiders! Nah, they're not that big...but I did see one about as long as my arm once. One of the guys in my squad picked it up to show us.

Haha, everybody who knows someone in Iraq got the email with those ugly mothers!

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

Oh! That's big... but not that big. Do they chase people?

Snopes tells me I was wrong about the size. Also, HAHAHA.

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

Not that I know of. Mostly they eat smaller bugs, I guess.

I personally heard the 'big enough to sleep in' tale back in '03

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

Yeah, well, I wouldn't want to wake up with one! One time we were camping in New Mexico and I woke up with a scorpion in my sleeping bag. [He makes a face at the memory.]

Crikey. What is this, Hoth?

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

Yeah, you have to watch out for those buggers. We had 'em in Iraq, too. Got to shake out your boots before you put them on...

Iraq was totally the new Hoth in '03.

[sixthanimorph.livejournal.com]

[sheepishly] ... I kinda knocked down the tent trying to kill it. Took a boot and just smashed... everything.

Pffffff

[brokenweapon.livejournal.com]

[Webb laughs.] At least you got out of it okay. And it makes for a good story.